having another painting day because it’s too hot to play outside today - oh and yesterday i thought that double street lamps look like bug antennas so i thought maybe that there was massive bugs underneath the earth wearing yellow goggles or something.
sometimes i think when i am washing my face i am blowing soap bubbles out of my nose but my eyes are closed so i don’t really know if i am ? ?
also i don’t think i have laughed so much as i did yesterday
was a skipping giggling ball of joy
bit bonged out from smoking all day yesterday with my frands - but had super accurate dreams about the situation that i am going through, i think it might have been on my mind before i went to sleep. but so accurate but still not exactly any less dream like. werrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd
i miss my cat
Dressing up is like masturbation, I do it for myself and if it turns you on, that’s fine, but this is for me and you’re not invited.
at the bird on Sunday something really special happened and i can’t appreciate enough when i am presented with these moments of interaction with strangers that i won’t forget for the rest of my life.
There was an event on at the bird that was a fundraiser for the Philippines, there was raffle tickets for Philippino hampers and they were selling traditional Phillippino food. Anyway there was this lady who was helping out with the food and she was a ball of energy and she filled the room with it. Shouting and laughing with her hands in the air, she was short and had beautiful long hair. I was watching her throughout the night and she just made me smile so much, her energy really had such an effect on me. So I went up and told her later on in the night that I could feel her energy and i appreciated her spirit and joy and that it was rubbing off on me.
She wanted to come sit with me so we went and sat down, she started talking about the troubles in life and how important it is to have belief. (I was kind of drunk so I can’t remember every detail of the conversation.) Then she said something about growing up in a mental institute when she was a teenager, and I grabbed her hand straight away and held it tightly and said “me too, me too.” We had the most beautiful conversation about the way that we felt when we went through all of those things and I explained to her the day when i just woke up and i realised that I loved everything and I was so appreciative of everything and I had hope. At the peak of the conversation and me describing that moment to her, she takes off her ring and puts it in my hand and closes it tightly and says “I want you to have this.”
I started to cry straight away, but tears of joy, and it was really beautiful, we had the longest, tightest, most love filled hug i have had in a long time. and after that i just went around telling everyone - whilst crying “she gave me her ring.”
It is going to bring me protection and i’m gonna wear it every day from now on.